Hi Reader

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Welcome to Rev Up for the Week - my weekly Sunday 4.05pm dose of positivity for the week ahead. If you're new here, perhaps because of Talking Kindness, then welcome. I'm here every Sunday and my goal is that you'll find these emails useful, that they set you up for the week, and that maybe sometimes you'll even reply and tell me what you think.

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As you've probably seen this week, we've been busy running the Talking Kindness podcast summit, hosting conversations about kindness with some incredible people. The original plan was to wrap it all up on Sunday, but seeing as we've had such good feedback, we're going to extend it until Tuesday next week. So there's still time to jump in and check it all out if you haven't already. On Friday we launched the final episode, which was me talking to myself. It's a bit of a behind-the-scenes story about my upcoming book. A special thanks to my assistant, Emilie, who has been managing all the tech and editing for 'TK'. I honestly couldn't have done it without her.

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So onto this week's thought...

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This week I've been thinking a lot about coaching and advice. I've been in a few different situations, both personally and professionally, where people have been asking me for feedback or input - different versions of "Am I doing the right thing?" or "What should I do next?" or "What should we do?". I have a natural inclination when I'm put in these situations, which I know a lot of us have, but it's not a great trait: I jump straight to wanting to fix things, or provide answers.

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This week, I've noticed something happening which is me overriding that "jump straight to the answer" instinct, and I've been replacing my answers with something more powerful - more questions. So even when I have a strong view, or feel like there's an obvious way forward, I'm trying to dial down the "opinionated Graham" and dial up the "coaching Graham".

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Of course, sometimes answers are needed. When you have information or a truth that allows someone to see what's in their blindspot, or where providing guidance will mean a shortcut to the work or bring a sense of safety, then bombarding that person with more questions isn't a great move. But using questions as a way of holding space for someone - being a listening-partner or a thinking-partner for them - can aid their learning, build confidence and ultimately be more empowering than just them getting your view. I've found this week, as I've been consciously playing around with the dynamic of 'questions vs. answers' in my head, that it's really helped me connect with people more empathetically, and have more meaningful conversations.

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So this week I invite you to experiment with dialling up the coaching and dialling down your opinions. Choose questions over answers when you're asked for help. Do things with people, not for people - and see how that changes the experience for both of you.

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OK, before I go, I have some big news.

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On the 10th October, the biggest book of the year hits the shelves. And no, I'm not talking about 'Unleashed' by Boris Johnson (Grrrr.)... I am of course talking about KIND: The quiet power of kindness at work.

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And this coming Wednesday, we are going to be launching something pretty epic. On Wednesday, we're launching a pre-order campaign. The idea is simple: buy a copy of the book between the 2nd and 9th of October and we have REWARDS to give you. We want to channel as many sales into the pre-launch phase as possible, with the aim of getting a book about kindness onto the Sunday Times Bestseller list. So look out for the email on Wednesday. If you buy a single copy, you'll get an invite to the digital launch event that's happening on 'launch eve' on Wednesday 9th. But there are much better rewards if you buy 2 or 5 copies. If you buy 10 copies, I'll give you a free place on my annual "6 Weeks to Ninja" productivity live programme (worth £600), and if you buy a hundred or 200 copies, I'll come in and deliver a free keynote talk for your team. There are loads of other rewards, too. It's going to be epic, and I hope it will encourage you to spread the word and help me rack up some early sales for this book. Look out for the email on Wednesday - be ready!

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The countdown really is on, now. And it's about to get verrrry real. So as I write this (on Friday afternoon), I'd better go get some rest.

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Have a great week,

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Graham

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PS - If you've bought a copy of the book on pre-order already, then firstly, THANK YOU! But secondly, don't worry, you'll be able to claim your rewards, too. Hold onto that receipt, or your confirmation email from Uncle Jeff. I'll tell you what to do with it next week.

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